Hemlock

There was an alarm clock beside our bed
It had a colour close to maroon ,
You used you say "There's no such colour as maroon, it's dark reddish brown "
There was a phase when fighting over colours
And making love afterwards was like cherry wine and hushed lullabies.

By the end of July ,
The bedside table was replaced with a crammed shelf and the alarm clock was left out unwind and broken ,
The maroon had now the colour reddish brown and the beetles outside in the garden stopped their hymn probably.
It was the end of our bare foot walks and blue satin laces.
It was the end of subway dances and Hemminway's poetry and unsaid words written.

There's so much about broken alarm clocks ,
It reminds you of a smell long forgotten  and yellow moth  contemplating death .
You see it was July and not March ,
March would have had a reason for people to leave because it's the month when people actually leave ,
I used to say this often to you wryly.
I used to say this because I hated my birthday month.
(I still do )

By the end of August
I got used to nobody calling up at 3 am
And spilling out poetry like my poet in the darkness ,
And my dark window pane whispered to make me fall asleep when this came back .
I wish like you now ,
I wish it snowed here,
Sexton said that there's a strange quietness about snow, no traffic ,no songs ,
Yes there is ,
Atleast snow doesn't remind me of hemp and grass that touched your feet.

By the end of September ,
The postman in my mind got tired of letters I wrote to you ,
And it isn't winter still.
You reminded me of hemlock and cats on green leaves.
The postmaster said I have gone mad.

It's December
And it's winter finally ,
My window has turned out to be a grave of all our memories ,
The wall paint is now worn out and dank ,
I got a place now to hibernate properly with tears and caffeine , its under my pink quilt.
I try to watch movies until dawn and wake up with the stars hiding behind wisps of cloud smoke ,
You still remind me of hemlock
And dead soul ,
Which is the last thing alive in my mind.